The Social Network

Despite the number of hours spent alone, plodding along the sidewalks and paths of your neighborhood, endlessly circling Green Lake with a thousand other lonely people, or suffering through the last three miles of a long run, running is ultimately a very social pursuit. It just seems like most of us haven’t figured that out yet.

On just about every run, I see cyclists in huge pelotons bombing down the trail, men and women in groups of five walking their dogs, new mothers pushing convoys of strollers to the coffee shop, and a gaggle of unkempt teenagers trying their latest moves at the skate park. Together. But we runners are all alone, as if running is some sort of holy, solitary pursuit that we alone can understand and that must be endured in isolation.

Of course I have days where all I want to do is lace up the trail shoes and spend a couple of hours alone decompressing from a long day, but if we’re all out there anyway, why are we by ourselves? There are hundreds of people out right now running alone…together. We’re not much of a community of runners, it seems.

I’ve been doing my part. Whenever I see another runner I give her the friendly wave, a thumbs up, maybe a quick “howdy.” More often than not, I get a confused stare in return. Sometimes an eye roll. Often, I am just ignored. I have tried to figure this out for years now. While cyclists, walkers, skiers, motorcycle riders and dog walkers share a friendly wave and a chat, runners shuffle past each other in solitude. Why? Somewhere along the way, we’ve been taught to suffer in silence. I don’t get it. Why suffer at all? I recently left the house on a rainy afternoon for a run. I had no plan, nowhere to go, and no time limit. I decided to just run for a while.

A mile into the run, I spotted a runner merging onto the trail and gave him a quick wave.

And miracle of all miracles, he waved back! He then fell into stride with me and we ran together for a few miles. We talked about different races, about shoes, about nutrition, about running routes. After a while, he checked his watch and turned around with a friendly good bye. I looked at my own watch. Five miles of running had slipped by unnoticed. No suffering required.

Even if you don’t run together, meeting up with friends for a weekly or nightly run makes it less of a chore and more of an event that you are less likely to skip. It’s easy to bail on yourself, but if your three pals are waiting for you at the trailhead at Cougar, you will at least have to come up with a lame excuse before you bag out.

Now I know some of you run with groups or training teams. I know there are pockets of the running world that are social, but from what I see on the streets, those groups are not the norm. We have to fix this.

1.     When you see another runner on the trail or the sidewalk. Wave. Simple. A smile doesn’t hurt.

2.     When you see a runner struggling and working hard, say something you have read on a sign at a race before. “There’s beer at the end” is often a good choice.

3.     Before you head out for a run, call someone and invite them along. They might say yes.

4.     If you see someone ahead of you, catch up and run with them a while. Introduce yourself. (Note to men, use this tactic with caution, and don’t be a creep.)

5.     When you are running with other people, make it fun. Anyone else remember playing “race you to the garbage can” in school? Try that. See who can turn in the fastest mile. Challenge each other up that hill. Last one to the car buys the beer.

Run with your head up and a smile on your face. Most runners are cool people (except you, grumpy guy in Woodinville who threw your empty GU package at my feet. You know who you are.) You just might meet someone worth hanging out with.

But maybe you’re just not a social person. At least in real life. Facebook thinks I have a couple hundred friends. I actually only have a couple. Social networking is apparently here to stay, and the running industry has made a clumsy pass at online technology.  Maybe someday we can virtually run together by syncing out treadmills and web cams. In the meantime, grab some friends and lace ‘em up. See you out there.